"Oh nothing, just hanging out watching the US Open"

8:39 PM
Federer: i wish i still enjoyed coke cause i'd do a ton of it
(alas)
Del Potro: sigh
8:41 PM
Federer: i wish i still enjoyed graphic novels too, but i guess it's for the best
Del Potro: or that you were gay bc you would fuck the living shit out of Floyd right now
Federer: exactly being straight kind of shuts you out
according to me, the world is flat, basically
there's a whole turtle under that globe that i have no idea exists

if that sounds weird, that's some shit medievalers used to believe
Del Potro: no no no I know it. "turtles all the way down"
Federer: ha yes
alright i'm out

My Dick Voted Against Universal Health Care

11:21 PM Chad: my dick is so gay it fucks my own ass

11:22 PM Jeremy: my dick thinks therefore it is

Chad: ha!

11:24 PM my dick is resting calmly on the couch while i sit at my desk. he said he needs a "power nap" whatever that mean

s

11:25 PM Jeremy: my dick just needs it's space

Chad: my dick is mad at your dick

11:27 PM Jeremy: my dick took a couple of your eggs and probably won't tell you

11:28 PM

Chad: my dick spends five nights a weeks at his girlfriends only to come home and complain that the electric bill is too high and doesnt want to pay half

@The_Lost_Generation

Cohn: last night i watched the first half hour of Manhattan and then the first half hour of Bottle Rocket. That may have been the funniest hour of movie magic in my life

11:39 AM Pedro: Manhattan is probably my favorite Woody Allen

fucking Mariel Hemingway or whoever that pre-teen is

what a heartbreaking scene

Cohn: it is here

her

11:40 AM Pedro: she offed herself huh

Cohn: no

her sis

margot

Pedro: yea margaux

Cohn: yes

mariel is alive

and in films

5'11"

11:41 AM Pedro: a giantess

if i, as some skinny, smart ass asian motherfucker

somehow started dating mariel hemingway

11:42 AM id be so fuckin glad her pops is under the ground

Cohn: foreal

Pedro: Thanksgiving would be like D Day

11:43 AM Cohn: "so Mr Hemingway, the lost generation hey?" pop pop pop

Pedro: haha

"hey Ernie, have you seen Keyboard Cat? Check this out .."

11:45 AM shit, i wonder if Pops threatened woody with violence if he tried anything funny

11:46 AM Cohn: he wasnt dead?

Pedro: i dunno

when did he die?

Cohn: its her Grandpa

her mom is his first wife

Pedro: oh he was long gone

60s

Cohn: mm

Pedro: manhattan wasnt till the late 70s

11:47 AM Cohn: if he saw the phrase @juliantran hed probably just have killed himself anyway

I Can't Keep Doing This ... With These ... People

1:10 PM AnhQuanFraticelli: i'd pay 35 bucks to have an orgasm right now

that's how hungover i am

1:11 PM DenzelRubenstein: im surfing inet dating sites, foreal

im wearing a swimsuit

AnhQuanFraticelli: one of my good buddies out here has a true match.com success story

he likened it to "looking at fish in a barrell"

1:12 PM i'm thinking of posting my profile, but with a white jewish guy's picture

to see how horribly disadvantaged i am in real life

it's a struggle

1:13 PM DenzelRubenstein: haha

AnhQuanFraticelli: i work twice as hard to get the same pussy as a less cool white guy

it's insane

1:14 PM DenzelRubenstein: im looking for specific skill sets right now. amazing tolerance for cigarette smoke in bed, bisexuality, willing to beat me and makes >$50,00/year.

very few out there

1:15 PM AnhQuanFraticelli: the beating you part and the >50k are opposites on the venn diagram

DenzelRubenstein: im basically looking for that one retarted fish that gloates at the top of the barrell and plays dead until you fuck it to life

AnhQuanFraticelli: ha

right

1:17 PM DenzelRubenstein: God its actually really depressing

i thought maybe thered been a shift in thought and normal hot people get on here and see what comes back

1:18 PM sadly its a bunch of black and latinas with names like "beyonce23" and "shakiraassmuncher44"

AnhQuanFraticelli: fuck

you would have thought that rom coms like "he's just not that into you" would have sent people to match.com in droves

1:19 PM and by people, i mean sad brunettes working in "media" and living in Ny

1:21 PM DenzelRubenstein: ha!

1:22 PM AnhQuanFraticelli: i just described my morning commute

a bunch of ok looking girls thinking about the emails they have to send this morning

1:23 PM DenzelRubenstein: 'ewww what is that guy doing? Oh is he jacking off? oh god! Im so tweeting this'

AnhQuanFraticelli: ha ha

1:25 PM DenzelRubenstein: when i got up this morning i saw a girl walk out her building in that standard whore office attire, where knowing its friday she dressed cute so she can get banged aftter happy with Steve from billing and services. She lit a cigarette and put on her glasses and wanted to just go up to her and grab her hair and slam her face first into my building and say "just fucking stop it ok. all of this."

1:27 PM instead i lit a cig of my own and farted, and thought "I think i need to take a shit"

And the Oscar Goes To ...

4:13 PM RomanCoppola: so the oscars are changing their format for best picture

4:15 PM

instead of 5 best picture noms

it's 10

4:16 PM i cant tell whether this will be used for good or evil

4:17 PM could the producers of He's Just Not That Into You be thinking "maybe this is our year"?

4:21 PM NickCassavetes: haha. wow

i cant believe that

the list to me is always 2

and its clear what the winner is

RomanCoppola: exactly

and then you have your Secret Oscars

which only you and your friends care about

4:22 PM America never wins that one

4:23 PM NickCassavetes: sotrue

8 minutes

4:31 PM NickCassavetes: you never saw my black timberland boat shoes when you were here did you?

RomanCoppola: nope

4:32 PM NickCassavetes: well i spared you one orgasm you can now have during intercourse with a female

RomanCoppola: thank you

those are in short supply due to the casual drinking i'm engaged in

1-2 whiskey based cocktails is enough to turn my dick into an inanimate objet d'art

4:34 PM NickCassavetes: you can make a molding and send it to Telluride for the best foreign film award

4:37 PM RomanCoppola: "short film category"

ba dum pshhh

4:40 PM NickCassavetes: hah